“The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord, “does violence to the one he should protect,”
says the Lord Almighty (Mal 2:16)
A girl happily marries and enters the boy’s house. Soon she discovers that the boy married her for other reasons and not for herself. The harassment starts and escalates ending in physical abuse. If unfaithfulness is considered as violence by God then how does He look at physical violence? Many girls suffer this fate in India either due to dowry or various other reasons.
A girl should first of all understand that she is not the property of her husband. She cannot be treated as he pleases. She must be respected and treated as equal. The boy’s parents or other members of the family have no right to harass her. A family should be full of love, where every member feels safe and blossoms with dignity and self-esteem. Marriage is not ownership, it is partnership.
“If he selects her for his son, he must grant her the rights of a daughter. If he (the son) marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing and marital rights. If he does not provide her with those three things, she is to go free, without any payment of money” (Ex 21:9-11). I am not developing a doctrine on the above text but just enlighten you regarding God’s heart towards a daughter-in-law. So take heart. If your husband lifts up his hand to beat you, look him in the eye and tell him boldly to stop it. Tell him, if he beats you, you will inform so and so. This so and so can be your pastor and his wife or a senior, respectable, spiritual couple willing to help you. In all likehood this will help.
If this doesn’t help, you must immediately report the matter to the said couple. Let them decide what to do. If things go beyond this, you must consider temporary separation which may bring the man to his senses. If this jolts him and he promises not to beat you, call for a few elders in the family and church. Let him make his promise in front of them and promise to abide by the conditions they impose upon him. Then you can go back to live with him if you feel safe. In the worst case you can turn to the women police station.
Live your life courageously!
Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91 9843511943
lilianstanley@gmail.com
Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
hq@bymonline.org
www.bymonline.org
Click here for more options
To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address
Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
+91-44-28450411, 8806270699
blc@bymonline.org
“The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord, “does violence to the one he should protect,”
says the Lord Almighty (Mal 2:16)
A girl happily marries and enters the boy’s house. Soon she discovers that the boy married her for other reasons and not for herself. The harassment starts and escalates ending in physical abuse. If unfaithfulness is considered as violence by God then how does He look at physical violence? Many girls suffer this fate in India either due to dowry or various other reasons.
A girl should first of all understand that she is not the property of her husband. She cannot be treated as he pleases. She must be respected and treated as equal. The boy’s parents or other members of the family have no right to harass her. A family should be full of love, where every member feels safe and blossoms with dignity and self-esteem. Marriage is not ownership, it is partnership.
“If he selects her for his son, he must grant her the rights of a daughter. If he (the son) marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing and marital rights. If he does not provide her with those three things, she is to go free, without any payment of money” (Ex 21:9-11). I am not developing a doctrine on the above text but just enlighten you regarding God’s heart towards a daughter-in-law. So take heart. If your husband lifts up his hand to beat you, look him in the eye and tell him boldly to stop it. Tell him, if he beats you, you will inform so and so. This so and so can be your pastor and his wife or a senior, respectable, spiritual couple willing to help you. In all likehood this will help.
If this doesn’t help, you must immediately report the matter to the said couple. Let them decide what to do. If things go beyond this, you must consider temporary separation which may bring the man to his senses. If this jolts him and he promises not to beat you, call for a few elders in the family and church. Let him make his promise in front of them and promise to abide by the conditions they impose upon him. Then you can go back to live with him if you feel safe. In the worst case you can turn to the women police station.
Live your life courageously!
Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91 9843511943
lilianstanley@gmail.com
Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
hq@bymonline.org
www.bymonline.org
Click here for more options
To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address
Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
+91-44-28450411, Mob:8806270699
blc@bymonline.org
